Monday, July 11, 2005
Last night was not a good night for sleeping. Granted, David and I were up until 1 o'clock talking, but still. I think we were giddy over the fact that both the kids were asleep by 9:30--what a miracle! Anyways, so at about 1, when we are getting ready to go to bed, Spud wakes up. I nursed him, and laid him back in his bed. He woke up about 3 minutes later, and I tried to pat a burp out of him. He settled down, so I laid him back in bed. Then a few minutes later, he woke up again. I think once or twice during this time he slept perhaps up to 20 minutes, but then he'd wake up again. I tried everything. Putting him on the bed next to us, laying him on my chest while I slept on my back... I even got up with him and took him to the living room and nursed him a little more. He'd fall asleep, then wake up shortly after being laid down. By 3 o'clock, I was beside myself. I made David take over for a little bit, but the curse of being the mother, at least for me, means that if the baby is noisy or whimpering and I can hear it, there is no way that I'll be falling asleep, and Spud had gone through an intense crying spell. So, I took him again. He finally fell asleep, after doing some prolonged occasional sniffles and that inhale/pant that happens after you've cried a long time. It was so sad and pathetic that I pretty much forgave him for the whole fiasco, though I still longed for sleep. This morning he woke up at 8:00, and David had a meeting at 9:00 so there was no chance of me getting any more sleep. I've been cleaning all morning and the exhaustion hits me hard in my stomach, it almost feels like hunger or sickness, but it's just exhaustion coming in waves from my center. What I wouldn't give today for a nanny so I could take a 3 hour nap.