Saturday, August 31, 2013

the daily grind

I think anyone who has cared for an infant can attest to the overwhelming monotony of it.  Sleep, wake, feed, change, play, repeat.  Over and over.  Again and again.  Day in and day out. In talking with other moms of twins, the sheer effort of getting through the very basics of the days (listed above) takes so much time and energy because of the x2 factor, that getting anything else done seems like it will necessitate a Herculean effort.  And if you are running on a perpetual sleep deprivation cycle, there just ain't no energy for that! 

Back in June I was asked to take a meal to a family in the ward.  In theory, I was happy to help and to be able to contribute a bit, as so many had been so helpful to me during the uber stressful first 2-3 months after the twins were born.  I can imagine that the compassionate service committee thought that now that the twins are 8 months old, surely I have things together and could make this contribution. I was able to rise to the occasion and planned ahead and made a pretty decent meal (some for ourselves as well) but it was a major deal and source of stress.  And that, plus the reaction I got when I inquired if there might be someone who could come sit with the twins during nap time once or twice a week so I could take my older kids on a bike ride, made me realize that perhaps people thought I should be "over" the life changing chaos that having twins created for me.  I've been visiting teaching exactly once in the 11 months since they arrive.  I am lucky to get out of the house once a week for 2 hours without a baby (and that has only been possible in the last 3 months since Mooberry started taking a bottle).  Even now, they were playing happily on my office floor, but now Mooberry is poopy and screaming at me, so I have to cut this short.

My point is, though, it's hard.  It's still hard.  Some things are easier, some things are harder.  But I'm not "over it," and I don't have everything figured out. 


All of us, but mostly Heidi said...

It's good to hear the real deal. Good thing those twins are so darn cute. I hope that fact helps make things just a wee bit easier. I love your new blog family-picture header.

Mary said...

Ah Mindy, I just read this post and I'm feeling for you. I know life with babies is hard, so I appreciate that you've made it to book club a few times, sat down to post on the blog occasionally, and even dragged the whole family to Church. There will come a day when you are free of diaper bags and the kids can buckle their own seat belts when it will be fun to have a large brood. Shortly later, the house will start staying clean for more than a few hours and you'll realize these little ones are becoming capable people and will soon be out the door and into their own lives. Time will pass slowly for you for a few more years, but then it will be flying by. Hang in there! It's a great ride!